Thursday 13 February 2020

Doggiewoggiez! Poochiewoochiez! (2012)



Directors: Everything is Terrible!
Cast: Hundreds of dogs and James Belushi's reaction faces

To begin with, this compilation of existing footage comes from Everything Is Terrible, a video blogging website whose origins go as far back as 2000 but properly launched their website in 2007, collecting together various pieces of filmed ephemera, for YouTube and online videos, publics screenings and DVD releases. In this case they can be can be seen as cinema's version of "plunderphonics", a term especially with the group Negativland who used existing sources to subvert their content and wider meanings.

Everything Is Terrible were likely helped through their existence by the burgeoning fascination with eighties VHS culture, purveyors and archivists of all the bizarre self released material even into the nineties that was available in the United States, even commercial tapes from that era onwards that we look on in hindsight at on YouTube dumbfounded with. The British like myself know this through anything from exercise videos and instructional films, but the United States is a significantly bigger country, with a bigger industry, and Everything Is Terrible can also add to this the likes of public access television, able to draw on the religious (Christian work about a dog puppet praying to Jesus) to whatever odd things are possibly found at the back of a garage.

Poochiewoochies admittedly, in its tale to retell Alejandro Jodorowsky's The Holy Mountain (1973) with dog videos, pulls from more Hollywood films and straight to video work, but when you see the likes of the dog message segments, that's the type of work EiT is famous for, cutting out some of the choice titbits alongside the most banal of dog films to create this production. Also, yeah, let's step back as The Holy Mountain in cult circles is a big film, Jodorowsky off the back of funding from the Beatles manager Allen Klein making a tale of spiritual discovery which was surreal and truly bizarre. The initial text is already weird, so this framework retold with dogs is admittedly intriguing. It is one of Doogiewoogiez's crutches to hinder it however as, whilst it could work perfectly as a template for an odyssey, it's barely used and vague here as a structure.

Why was it used? Possibly the idea of "God = Dog" joke and there is the scene where the group of followers wishing to become enlightened have their consciousnesses connected to an actual dog, a sequence whose sound clip to first person dog shots from various sources does work in Doogiewoogiez. As a result, the vagueness of the structure means this still requires the other film to work, which wouldn't be an issue weren't it not for the fact that it's left as a disjointed collection of pieces which can tire without context. The structural choice only works occasionally when it's explicitly pulling from the source material, including the introduction of those followers, who were given little stories each within The Holy Mountain, here used to go into segments such as dogs and sex, dogs in sports etc.

It does tap into the really questionable attitudes we have when it comes to our pets, and I say this as someone who grew up with dogs (specifically boxers) all my life and love them. Alongside our habit to fixate over animals even over fellow human beings - such as is the case with us British - alongside the complacent view we have about how unique human beings are. This works both ways as, in one of the best aspects of the film, the research done, you see just how much embarrassing material our four legged friends have had to put up with, be it being forced into costumes or a cavalcade of badly animated mouth movements plastered over their faces. Even before I consider my own opinions, that as there is no Dr. Doolittle available, and thus we cannot truly talk to dogs and gauge a similar intelligence to ours or not, the deep pit of dog films and television churned out since the dawn of cinema, be it monochrome scenes of dogs being dressed like cowboys to Marmaduke's artificial distorted facial features, is a real sign of how we've come to abuse this is cinema, even before the film shows all the times in fiction dogs were kicked, threatened with being shot or having a blowtorch to their face in stories.


I say this as someone who argues no idea, even a dog being allowed to play American football as in one film here, is inherently bad, and that a great funny dog film can be made, but that the evidence here shows all the ways we miss the mark without having to see the entire length of them. Some pretty infamous material makes its appearance. Poochinski (1990), a failed TV pilot about Peter Boyle being killed and returning back as an English bulldog puppet, or Karate Dog (2004), one of Bob Clark's last films about Chevy Chase as a dog who has eventually has a fight with Jon Voight in the finale. James Belushi also becomes the unofficial mascot for all the reaction shots he has over the film, all possibly because (like Cuba Gooding Jr and even older Vincent Price) he made one film involving a dog, K-9 (1989), which is gone to constnalty through the film for clips.

Many mainstream films like Snow Dogs (2002) and Air Bud (1997) appear. With all the narratives excised, you forget how bizarre a lot of these films are in hindsight, and there is a good moment where, in pain staking research, the same plot points are repeated together from these films, from child protagonists always losing parents to vague film disease/car crash incidents off-screen or how dog related genital/buttock trauma is a common joke throughout these films.

The reference to Negativland is appropriate as, honestly, there was many missed opportunities in terms of subverting their material. Negativland can be humorous but also hit salient points, and the only time Doogiewoogiez stands on that band's shoulders, heavy handed but perfectly justified, is the segment that starts with racial stereotypes (both dogs literally dressed as stereotypical African tribes people to the obsession with "urban" slang even from young male characters let alone dogs) before getting into the idea of dog breeds I myself have always had a concern about. The idea that the obsession with breeding exact breeds and marginalisation of "mongrels", if applied to human beings, would be eugenics, which EiT in their one great moment here don't pussyfoot around mocking, alongside bizarre clips like a British woman being interviewed and presuming because she has a Chihuahua, a dog of Mexican origins, it presumably likes Mexican food.

Mostly Doogiewoggiexz goes for obvious jokes, some choice cuts of weirdness that are too many to pick out, from farts being used to stop dog chupacabras, to dogs playing baseball. It does cause one to be amused that, in a hundred years, we've covered so much with dogs you can have the aforementioned brawl between Jon Voight and a CGI dog, or that certain actors like Cuba Gooding Jr. appear in these films in their long, varying careers. It's a shame the structure isn't enough still, the weakest material all the manipulation of used images into psychedelic video collage material, not exactly compelling to be frankly. The only aspect of those sequences, which look like the kind of online videos that became dime a dozen on YouTube, is how Harry the Bigfoot, from Harry and the Hendersons (1987), is an honorary member of that collage despite being a cryptozoological ape creature that the creators clearly were obsessed with since childhood.

The other issue is that frankly Doggiewoggiez is ironic to a fault. A sarcasm does feel pronounced throughout, and it's felt especially with the use of Christian material as there's always a cheapness to the humour, a laboured nature when the material itself, when bad, should be allowed to hang itself on its own petard, and other moments like the humanoid dog puppet who prays to God, who in scenes is panicked and scared, would be far more fascinating for me to see in their original context to unpick. Material like a young boy dancing and singing Magic Dance by David Bowie with actors in dog costumes, after a talking well has told him he can do so if he wishes to, is weird but there's a charm too, a production like this not realising that for every eyebrow raising and questionable piece there's others which are more sympathetic for me beyond taking lines of dialogue out of context for crude jokes or to be just laughed at. Yes, some of it deserves to be questioned, like Tim Allen in a family film being naked in front of his wife and kids after turning back from being a dog, but even the dippy and strange things like people who believing their dogs are psychics and reincarnated spirits are still human beings to be considered. And all of this is in knowledge that the project was always meant to be fun first; it's just that it needed to be more focused and sharper.

Abstract Spectrum: Kitsch/Psychotronic/Surreal
Abstract Rating (High/Medium/Low/None): None


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